Jo Interviews the Three of Us

Bagman, Butler, and I recently accepted the challenge of being interviewed by Jo at a Majority of Two. So we are here today, sitting in comfortable chairs around a crackling fire, ready to answer her questions with complete candor. She looks around with a slight look of concern at what complete candor might imply, but goes ahead and asks her first question.

1. Have you ever been influenced by a work of art – music, painting, book – and if so, how?

Mark: My grandfather was an artist and watching his discipline and his vision come to life through his brushes and palette set standards which have challenged me ever since in everything I’ve done.

Butler: Mondrian. His lines are so straight and narrow.

Bagman: Jackson Pollack and Picasso’s erotic etchings. Oh yes, and I enjoyed reading Lady Chatterley’s Lover by flashlight when I was 13.

2. If you were a chocolate bar, what type would you be?

Mark: M&M’s, multi-colored, crunchy on the outside, sweet on the inside with a nut in the middle.

Butler: I usually avoid sugar and choose to snack on celery, thank you very much.

Bagman: Warm fudge sauce dripped all over your delicious (deleted deleted deleted)

3. I'm not sure I really should have asked this, but what is your secret weapon to lure the opposite sex?

Mark: A sense of humor and well-written marriage vows.

Butler: My ability to listen carefully without interrupting and my skill at neatly folding laundry.

Bagman: The fact that I’d much rather give pleasure than get pleasure, that I like to take my time, that I’m gentle, and – don’t you dare delete this, Butler!! -- I really like kissing

Butler: Why would I delete that?

Bagman: everywhere.

Pause followed by crashing sounds over and doors slamming. Emergency phone calls being made to the League of Decency. Sirens coming from a distance.

4. I’m now afraid to ask, but what, in your opinion, is your greatest accomplishment?

Mark: Admitting I was powerless over my drinking and letting the incredible people of Alcoholics Anonymous show me how to live a sober life.

Butler: Managing to confine Bagman to Mark’s imagination so that after wrecking one marriage he hasn’t been able to wreck his second.

Bagman: Staying alive despite constant and depressing lectures from Butler and finding other creative fires to light.

5. How many friends do you have on your Facebook account?

Mark, Butler, and Bagman: We have no idea because after finding Blogspot, we never looked back. Except once, when Bagman stalked Michelle.

And thank you, Jo, for interviewing us. Jo? Jo? Are you still there? I guess she must have clicked off to another blog and blocked us after the hot fudge sauce comment. Oh well.