I think I'm ready to confess now.

It's been weighing heavily on me.  Because I used to blog almost daily and then I disappeared, almost completely for awhile. 

BAGMAN:  "Do you think anyone would have noticed if you didn't keep explaining yourself?"

BUTLER: "Well, there are a few people who always welcome him back when he does put a post on."

Can I get back to confessing?

BAGMAN:  "If relieves your guilt...or mostly if it will shut you up...be my guest."

So, well, um...er...anyhow, it was partly about work and partly about family and it is good for bloggers to take a break now and then but there was also the fact that a new interest in my life.  It set me afire with interest and passion to explore more and more.  But it was not something I could do at work and I didn't want it to detract from my family so the only time left for me to indulge myself was in the early morning hours when I was alone and in private.   Since that was my blogging time, I began...(sob, sigh, wipe tears away)...sneaking away from blogspot to partake in the delights of website after website.  I never realized the Internet had so much of this kind of material!  I wanted to talk about it on Blogspot but I didn't think the poets, artists, photographers and sensitive purveyors of creativity would understand how I could have sunk so low.  Even now, I expect people who care about me to give dire warnings about how it could make me go blind...

BUTLER:  "Or at least broke."

BAGMAN: "But the skinflint still isn't willing to risk any real money, the scaredy cat!"

Yes, I finally have to admit that I developed an interest, I'm ashamed to say, in the stock market.  Fundamental analysis, technical analysis...watching the daily passionate war between bulls and bears play out around the world.  Dipping my toes in the broiling waters by creating imaginary accounts with imaginary money.  I've been giving myself a crash course...

BUTLER: "Emphasis on the word 'crash."

I've learned how dangerous a place it can be and seen in clear detail how big money fleeces the moms and pops who are trying to save what is left of their IRA's.   But even more dangerous are those times when my imaginary money goes up and I begin to think -- what if I invested just a little real money?  Which, I confess, I did by moving a small amount from one of our mutual funds.  And won a bit.  Which was nice but, again, dangerously tempting me to dive in.  Fortunately, by now, I have learned enough to expect that temptation and ignore it.  The trading floor is a fascinating place with more psychology than economics going on.  

Anyhow, that's my confession.  I think I will continue to dip my toes and maybe one foot in the quicksand but I'm regaining a little balance so that I can at least make time to blog from time to time. 

I'm still not sure how somone can be both a poet/photographer/writer and a student of the stock market.  It seems so schizophrenic somehow. 

Okay.  I'm ready to receive my penance now.