Happy St. Paddy's Day?
Wildly celebrating my retirement last St. Patrick's Day
BAGMAN: "Why so glum, Dude?"
"I don't remember," I reply. "Probably because I've never liked going away parties."
BUTLER: "Whoever took that picture sure did an excellent job of trashing you. You'll never make a good politician if you don't remain constantly vigilant and always smiling for cameras."
"Why would I ever want to be a politician?" I answer. "Never in my wildest thoughts."
And so we are off for the posting of the green:
The color green comes from chlorophyll
which our advanced civilization
collects through a system of pipes...
and processes in chlorophyll refineries...
then stores in chlorophyll holding tanks.
The United States has one of the largest
chrolophyll footprints in the world
which explains the little known fact
about why the Statue of Liberty is green.
BAGMAN: "Wait a minute! Wasn't the Statue of Liberty made in France?"
BUTLER: "Wake up, Butler. Mark's pulling your leg."
BAGMAN: "No he's not! I'm sitting across the room! He's just talking."
Butler rolls his eyes and bangs himself on the forhead with the palm of his hand while I continue typing whatever flows through my mind.
Chrolophyll is a lighter form of energy than oil...
Wearing green helps people fly...
Bagman's mouth drops open in amazement and Butler just closes his eyes, drops his head, and shakes it sadly back and forth.
Green occurs naturally in parts of the animal kingdom
Some animals use it as camoflage
Some use it as an aphrodesiac
And some use it as a costume for Halloween parties
such as this fellow who is dressed as a string bean.
I look up after realizing that I don't have any more pictures and also don't have any kind of cute ending.
Butler is gone. I hear his footsteps mincing down the hallway. "Why'd he leave early?" I ask Bagman.
BAGMAN: "Beats me. I was learning alot. I didn't know anything like that about green. But tell me more about the aphrodesiac thing...