Monday, April 20, 2009

Babbling through writer’s block

Writer’s block is not a state of not being able to find anything to say. It is a state of having so much to say that you can’t figure out where to start. Writer’s block is like a huge log jam in a river and you have to figure out which log to move. While standing on it, of course.

I’m always so damn smart when other people complain of writer’s block. I lean back in my leather chair, put my feet on my desk, and if I smoked a pipe, I would light it. But I don’t. And the chair is actually some faux leather vinyl, to be honest.

I speak in a slightly British accent and suggest that the quickest way to end the stand-off is to start typing words. Anything. Start pushing logs around and eventually the current will take over. Always so easy to give advice.

Oh God!! And add photographs to it! Yesterday I drove to Lowes to buy 77 bricks and I left the camera at home. Now I realize that not everyone compulsively takes the camera to buy bricks. But ever since I can remember, I’ve been terrified of spotting a good photo opportunity and not having a camera.

A photograph indicative of nothing in this blog
although Reggie Girl recently shot pictures of a car show.

The truth is, of course, that I regularly spot good photo opportunities and I do have my camera. But I don’t stop. Damn the inertia of the mundane world! Yesterday someone who was just getting into photography asked me for some advice. I said, in a slightly German accent this time, the most important photographic accessory was the brake pedal in the car.

Every day for a year and a half, on my way to work, I pass a lawn and garden shop that has a line of wooden chairs out front – each one painted a different brilliant color. In the morning, the low angle sun hits these chairs and makes them explode from a neutral background. Twice I have almost rear-ended someone in stop and go traffic because I have been admiring them. Not once have I ever stopped to shoot them. Always so easy to give advice.

But I went to Lowes without taking my camera. I did so because I have so many recent pictures in my computer, waiting to be reviewed, deleted, sorted, filed, adjusted, manipulated, tagged, and maybe even posted or framed, that I was afraid to take any more.

The non-indicative picture having been played with...

And for two days now, I’ve gone to Blogspot, started to read the blogs of people I follow and turned it off and opened up Photoshop, looked at all the junk there, turned it off, opened up Word, switched to Blogspot, to Photoshop, to Word…

Bagman was even forced to admit for the first time in his life that there might be too many women in the world.

I think I’ll go take bricks out of the car.

But, hey! I had writer’s block and started typing about anything and look! A blog! I sure give good advice!


  1. HUM.... the hardest word is the first...
    whats the deal with too many women in the world - I don't have any context?
    Women in general are distracting you??
    I like the photo of the engine before you mess with it. Is this the engine in your little red car? doesn't matter I like it. Okay I'm going to follow your lead and write a first word.... doubt if will sound as clever but too many clever people can mess up a good thing.... what do too many women have to do with it?

  2. I need a picture of those chairs and and answer to ...what are you making with 77 bricks?

  3. I want to know why you need 77 bricks!

    Bosh can't just drop that in and then not explain.....damn rude......


  4. You know, you probably should have got 78 bricks....just in case you do know that don't you. Butler knows that for sure, Bagman wouldn't care.


  5. I have some leftover bricks here. I have moved them TWICE from place to place. If you have a use, let me know. My problem recently has been becoming dependent on a photograph to stimulate my blog. I think one should be able to write without the photo if one is a good writer. I have been to Lowe's dozens of time the last few months and never thought about taking a camera...hmmm.

  6. darn that writer's block! bet that's my problem right now and not so much spring fever as I have thought it was. And yes, why 77 blocks and not 76 or 78?

  7. Hee, hee, very good post for someone with writer's block!

  8. B&B...truly this proves there is strength in numbers. Since there are three of you, your odds are much better to find a blog topic...compared to those of us who only have one of us.

  9. Well, I think you combatted the dreaded WB quite well. However, if you think you might need just a smidgeon of extra help, you can zip over to my blog and see what's cooking there. Just might give you some ideas...

    So, did you get those 77 bricks to throw at the crazy colored chairs?

  10. blog topics? hmm........
    it probably helps that i only blog to suit me and that i have a wide range of topics that include fart noises and communication with arch angels.......yes, that helps.....

  11. "I love the shot of the engine Sir Mark, Sir Butler and Sir Bagman" - said in me best Irish accent.
    Which one of you is distracted by women and are you burying Bagman with those 77 bricks? Again??? He's just goijg to get out you know....
    You're a darlin and you made me laugh with this post :)

    Steady On
    Reggie Girl

  12. Babbling is good, and you do it so well, Sirs - Just as well as you make us smile with your stories... And I'm certain there'd never be enough women for Bagman of Old!

  13. Babbling is fun, I do it all the time. Excellent post for having writer's block!