Wednesday, March 4, 2009

A Poem from Bagman

I’m a bit busy working this week. So, I’ve pulled out a poem from Bagman’s file cabinet. Bagman’s file cabinet, of course, has no files in it and no file drawers. It is turned on its back where he just tosses papers and things into the open holes where the file drawers used to be.

BAGMAN: “I thought you were too busy to write a blog. If you’re going to use one of my poems, go ahead and use it. But stop whining and go do whatever it is that’s more important that blogging.”

Over Fifty

The first time my wife,

who read about it in the Post,

sent me to the free prostate screening,

I decided to see what the minivan would do

if I stopped giving a shit

about cops

and kept it on the floor ‘til the motor blew.

The answer was a hundred and thirty seven

where it screamed, rattled,

and floated across the road like bumper cars

at the county fair.

But no cops saw so I stopped

at an overlook and peed over the side

into the valley below.

When I got back she asked

if everything had gone all right.

“Just fine,” I said.

(c) 2004


  1. From Butler:
    How come you only gave Bagman credit for writing this poem. I co-authored it. Give credit where credit is due. Why does Bagman get all the credit?

  2. You floored the ole minivan???? You daredevil you, lol :)
    I like your poem dude......I think I just like calling you dude. I actually say it sometimes....stictly for effect.
    Gotta make a statement sometimes, you know dude??

    Steady On
    Reggie Girl

  3. Lovely, the humour is tremendous - perhaps because I could relate to all of it.

  4. A most tender and moving poem, almost ethereal in its insights into the human soul.

    Byron would be jealous.

    As I am at your getting a minivan up to such speed!

  5. 137 in a Minivan is, of course, a definitive example of poetic license. Thinking of myself as "dude" may be similar.

  6. You're a funny boy/s B & B. I think I like you. A tad nuts but hey, who isn't:0)

  7. You absolutely must see Gran Torino. We ended up seeing this because we got into the wrong theater by hubby wouldn't let me see the ticket. Anyway, the guy in the movie (played by Clint Eastwood0 could have written that poem.

  8. A little rebellious streak rearing its head I fear...
    Your poem roared along and took me with it...
    Happy prostate day